I am going to start a weekly blog about my personal casino journey. You will find a few supporting stories in the Casino Forums. Here is the first of many.
Some will be light and fluffy, some sad and bothered, and others downright preachy, but so it goes and ya welcome as always to turn the page.
The beginning.
My First Job (1991)
My first wall (1991)
The Gambling Bug.
When you get the gambling bug, it can bite and bite hard. At some point most of us will have an experience which bears to mind that old gambler hotline slogan, "when the fun stops".
The Voices.
After each epic gambling loss, come the voices. "This was a wake up call, I am never gambling again", or lots of - "you are SO stupid", and of course,"I was buried, got even and lost it all back again and where are my damn pants?".
In my younger years I was a loose cannon on many fronts and gambling fed the worst parts of that experience. I was all in. Out of the Army, out of Hollywood, out of time. I laid into everything, whatever was laid in front me, I wanted a big fat piece. I wanted to look back and revel in the experience. Not just the whimsy that many people get from casual intersections, but the visceral experience you can feel and taste even many years later.
Gambling was my drug, my release, my total bag. Thankfully I learned to change my definitions of gambling and find a happy medium between playing for fun and a deep dark hole. If not, I most likely would not be alive today to write this.
The Rules.
First, I had to set some rules for myself. Let me just say it was not easy. It took years before I even had a sense of myself. But finally I came up with a short list. 1) Avoid Tables, I am simply way too competitive, I NEED to beat the dealer. Bank be damned. 2) No alcohol when I play (you would think this one would be easy) and finally 3) Play with a fixed budget each month.
The Envelope.
I budget a fixed monthly amount, putting it all in an envelope that represents my entire gambling budget. No money in the envelope, no money to play. But I also add to it when I win. Each week I pick a day to play which gives me something to look forward to. On that day I leave all cash cards at home and just take the cash I plan to use. Btw, If I win on that day, I use the winnings to "buy" an extra gambling day, pay off bills or purchase something I have wanted. Regardless, the envelope rules.
Last year was the first year I managed the envelope successfully for the entire 12 months. At the end I had a net positive amount, honestly quite surprising. I am absolutely certain this was a first. But, it also seems like a great way to manage one’s bankroll.
The Forum
Which leads me to a few stories that made me realize I need to cure the bug. Here is one of the stories I attribute to having started it all.
Next week David's journey goes back to school. The girlfriend. the son, the accident and the pit stop that started it all.
Some how I picture a Rebel Without a "Rebel Without a Cause"